May 21, 2004

Sabbatical.

Last update till sometime next week. Time to take the kid to the Land of Disappearing Money.

Points to Ponder.

* Why? If you're not wanted at a party, why keep showing up?

* Removal of information for women from government websites was not as widespread as originally thought.

* History lesson with present relevance.

* Why you are not represented by your government.

* Ever seen blatantly flawed logic? Homeless people are better off than they were in the 1700's so quitcherbichin.

* Coming up short this year with neato vacation ideas? Try this.

* Concerned Women for America has a straight man writing about gay marriages. Leading authority on lesbian parenting?

* It's called constructive criticism.

* Dear Pinnochio, puppets are disposable. HAND.

* Clinton's 'don't ask don't tell' policy has long reaching ramifications.

* Rick Perry is slipping in the polls. 37% approval. Those special sessions *are* working.


Something Funny (in extended entry)

Republican National Committee - Convention Schedule New York, NY

6:00 PM Opening Prayer led by the Reverend Jerry Fallwell

6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance

6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights

6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing

6:46 PM Seminar #1: Iraq Strategies - Voodoo/DooDoo WMD

7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong

7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries

7:40 PM EPA Address #1: Mercury - It's what's for dinner!

8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next

8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh

8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: The Homos are after your Children!!

8:30 PM Round table discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only)

8:50 PM Seminar #2: Corporations: The Government of the Future

9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man 'O Mine"

9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong

9:10 PM EPA Address #2 -- Trees: The Real Cause of Forest Fires

9:30 PM Break for secret meetings

10:00 PM Second prayer led by Cal Thomas

10:15 PM Lecture by Karl Rove: Doublespeak Made Easy

10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration: How to squint and talk macho

10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark "deer in headlights" stare

10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory Kevlar chastity belt

10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black republicans

10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong

10:50 PM Seminar #3: Education: The Drain on our Nation's Economy

11:10 PM Hilary Clinton Piņata

11:20 PM Second Lecture by John Ashcroft: Evolutionists: The Dangerous New Cult

11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again

11:35 PM Blame Clinton

11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies

11:50 PM Closing Prayer led by Jesus Christ

12: 00 PM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary Overlord

12:10 PM Disclosure of intention to invade France.


Source: Unknown.

Posted by kerry at May 21, 2004 08:15 PM | TrackBack
Comments

Just bumped into your blog ! Have a great sabbatical, thanks for the links, I'll be mentioning you ! I especially liked the Independent " constructive" criticism article.
Have a wonderful time with the sea lions etc.

Posted by: LR at May 24, 2004 03:35 PM

if its any different than that i'd be surprised. way too funny.

Posted by: chinkowski at May 24, 2004 08:28 PM
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