It's hard to improve on sheer comic genius... so I'll just focus on the points that floored me from last night's "performance". Sliced and diced for amusement and clarity.
Rule #1: Whatever the question, respond with either; Social Security, Gas/Oil Prices, Bankruptcy/Tort reform or simply pretend the question wasn't asked.
Regarding SS reform pollingQ Is the poll troubling?
THE PRESIDENT: Polls? You know, if a President tries to govern based upon polls, you're kind of like a dog chasing your tail. I don't think you can make good, sound decisions based upon polls. And I don't think the American people want a President who relies upon polls and focus groups to make decisions for the American people.
If a President isn't listening to what the people are saying about his proposal and spending his time in a vacuum, he's more like a old dog that can't be taught new tricks.
Q Your top military officer, General Richard Myers, says the Iraqi insurgency is as strong now as it was a year ago. Why is that the case? And why haven't we been more successful in limiting the violence?THE PRESIDENT: I think he went on to say we're winning, if I recall. ...yadda yadda yadda...
If he recalls? The boy is truly, in the bubble.
Q Do you think that's an inappropriate statement? And what I asked is --THE PRESIDENT: No, I just don't agree with it.
Q You don't agree with it.
THE PRESIDENT: No, I think people oppose my nominees because -- because of judicial philosophy.
Q Sorry, I asked you what you think of the ways faith is being used in our political debates, not just in society --
THE PRESIDENT: No, I know you asked me that. Well, I can only speak to myself, and I am mindful that people in political office should not say to somebody, you're not equally American if you don't happen to agree with my view of religion......
Allow me the liberty of rewording your line of questioning to fit my needs while contradicting my dad.
Q So am I reading correctly that the energy bill would not have had an effect on today's high gasoline --THE PRESIDENT: Well, it would have 10 years ago. That's exactly what I've been saying to the American people -- 10 years ago if we'd had an energy strategy, we would be able to diversify away from foreign dependence. And -- but we haven't done that. And now we find ourselves in the fix we're in. It's taken us a while to get there, and it's going to take us a while to get out. Hopefully, additional crude oil on the market from countries with some spare capacity will help relieve the price for the American consumers.
Yeah, damn that Republican majority in both houses, that durn "Contract with America"... it didn't focus enough on drilling in Alaska.
Q So in the near-term you think there will be more attacks and more people dying?THE PRESIDENT: I'm not going to predict that. In the near-term I can only tell you one thing: we will stay on the offense; we'll be relentless; we'll be smart about how we go after the terrorists; we'll use our friends and allies to go after the terrorists; we will find them where they hide and bring them to justice.
So, yes then? More fuel for the fire we started in Iraq, next question?
Q Mr. President, it was four years ago when you fist met with Russian President Vladimir Putin. You said you looked into his eyes and you saw his soul. You'll also be meeting with the Russian leader in about a week or so. What do you think of Putin now that he has expressed a willingness to supply weapons to outlaw regimes, specifically his recent comments that he said he would provide short-range missiles to Syria and nuclear components to Iran?THE PRESIDENT: (...)
And what the Iranians have said was, don't we deserve to have a nuclear power industry just like you do? I've kind of wondered why they need one since they've got all the oil, but nevertheless, others in the world say, well, maybe that's their right to have their own civilian nuclear power industry. And what Russia has said: Fine, we'll provide you the uranium, we'll enrich it for you and provide it to you, and then we'll collect it. And I appreciate that gesture. I think it's -- so I think Vladimir was trying to help there. I know Vladimir Putin understands the dangers of a Iran with a nuclear weapon. And most of the world understands that, as well.
Hello!!!! Axis of Evil!!!! Hellooooooo!!!
Q Mr. President, in your question -- your answer before about Iraq, you set no benchmarks for us to understand when it is the troops may be able to --THE PRESIDENT: In Iraq?
Q In Iraq, yes -- about when troops may be able to come back.
THE PRESIDENT: Right.
Q Based on what you've learned now in two years of fighting the insurgency and trying to train the Iraqi security forces, can you say that within the next year you think you could have very substantial American withdrawal of troops?
THE PRESIDENT: David, I know there's a temptation to try to get me to lay out a timetable, and as you know, during the campaign and -- I'll reiterate it -- I don't think it's wise for me to set out a timetable. All that will do is cause an enemy to adjust. So my answer is, as soon as possible. And "as soon as possible" depends upon the Iraqis being able to fight and do the job.
What a refreshingly honest response. A massive sigh of relief was heard around the world. Or not. Nice that it's up to the Iraqis and not us now.
Q Sir, you've talked all around the country about the poisonous partisan atmosphere here in Washington. I wonder why do you think that is? And do you personally bear any responsibility in having contributed to this atmosphere?THE PRESIDENT: (shortened for clarity) Me? No.
Remember, the buck doesn't stop in this administration, it's passed to infinity and beyond.
Q Mr. President, under the law, how would you justify the practice of renditioning, where U.S. agents who brought terror suspects abroad, taking them to a third country for interrogation? And would you stand for it if foreign agents did that to an American here?THE PRESIDENT: That's a hypothetical, Mark. We operate within the law and we send people to countries where they say they're not going to torture the people.
That is to say, you have no proof and without any hard proof, you need to shut up and sit down.
NCLB questionQ What about the lawsuit? Which --
THE PRESIDENT: Well, I don't know about the lawsuit; I'm not a lawyer. But, you know, I'll ask my lawyers about the lawsuit. But I know some people are trying to unwind No Child Left Behind. I've heard some states say, well, we don't like it. Well, you know, my attitude about not liking it is this: If you teach a child to read and write, it shouldn't bother you whether you measure. That's all we're asking.
Underfunded mandate that is impossible to implement in smaller districts... that's the beef. Step outside the bubble, sunshine.
Posted by kerry at April 29, 2005 04:56 AM | TrackBack