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Free Ride Doesn't Equal Free Rein

How does anyone reach a compromise on the erradication of Article 3 of the Geneva Convention?

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The White House and Senate Republicans who revolted against the president's proposal on tough CIA interrogations of terrorism suspects said on Sunday a compromise was possible to heal a party rift over treatment of prisoners.

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The White House wants Congress to pass a law that would give the CIA a legal foundation for tough questioning methods which it says have protected the country from attack, but which critics say are tantamount to torture.

New 'Compromised' Rules:

• After you've stacked up a group of naked prisoners and sodomized them with glow sticks you're required to holler "No Homo!".
  
• All interrogations will be televised. If the public is willing to give the administration a pass, they have to view the consequences.
  
• To eliminate potential whistleblowers within the CIA, all torture will be outsourced.
  
• The line "Al Qaeda doesn't abide by the Geneva Convention" can no longer be used. We can no longer complain when our troops are treated inhumanely.